WHAT IF SHAKESPEARE WAS SEXTING!!!!

BARDS GONE WILD!!!!

of William Shakespeare.
One can only imagine how the great literary giants would have
sounded today. There’s something about words like thine…and
my beloved that send a shiver down any woman’s spine. They
just don’t make them like they used to.
But what if…just imagine …Shakespeare with an iphone….or Emily
Dickinson on Twitter. Here are some hilarious verses and their
modern text translations. Found these in MORE magazine. Good
work!
William Shakespeare:
Shall I compare thee to a sumer day
SEXT: U R so hot!!!!!
Robert Louis Stevenson:
…shadowing the complexity of that game of consequences
to which we all sit down.
SEXT: WTF R U sure it’s mine?
Anne Bradstreet:
I prize thy love more than whole mines of gold
SEXT: OK w prenup
Robert Lovelace:
True, a new mistress now I chase.
SEXT: Dumping u
Elizabeth Barrett Browning:
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
SEXT: I wanna tie u up, spank u,  lick ur arms
legs, face and toes
and here’s my contribution……

W.B. YEATS
Wine Comes in the Mouth
And Love Comes in the Eyes.
SEXT: Three martinis and U R a Babe

CASTING FRIDAY: TV SHOW LOOKING FOR YOUR FAMILY

Does your family have a dream. Have you always wanted to own a restaurant on the lake, a family bakery  or an adventure tour service?  A television company is looking for you…and the crazier the family goal…the better.

Your family could star in their own television docu-series on a major cable network.
The show will go with you step by step as you go after that “pie-in-the-sky drama’ will chronicle the fun and the drama of a family as they pursue a goal – and what happens when and if they reach it.  The bigger the dream, the better!

They want moms, dad kids, and grandparents. the more the merrier.

Send all contact info, current pictures (jpeg) and describe your dream in detail. Tell why your family would be great for the show and send and videos, newspaper articles or anything you have to spotlight your goal. Send to thebigfamilydream@gmail.com

Good luck!!!

 

 

CASTING FRIDAY……PUT UP YOUR DUKES!!!!

angry-womanDo you have a beef with someone? A sister that hooked up with your boyfriend? A friend who spread rumours behind your back? A business partner that ripped you off? Well the network that brought us Catfish is looking for exactly that kind of tension in a new show. So if you’re at war with a friend or loved one , or know someone that is. Then this is your big chance. Toxic relationships, tanked friendships……the list goes on.

The say they get you a resolution to that problem.  That’s quite a lofty premise.

To submit you have to be over 18.  Please send you name, address, contact numbers, a picture of you self and your nemisis  (jpeg) and a description of what happened.

TO SUBMIT:ACJcasting@gmail.com

 

LOSE WEIGHT FOR NBC SHOW S.T.R.O.N.G. !!!!!!

 

weight scales

 

Oh this is never easy. Losing weight is the life long quest for almost everyone. But how would a little cash help you get motivated? NBC is looking for you if you ae interested in losing 30 pounds and becoming the best possible version of yourself.

S.T.R.O.N.G is a fitness-focused show by the network that brought the VOICE and the creator of THE BIGGEST LOSER. Twelve awesome fitness trainers and twelve contestants will team up to compete. If you win you’ll not only take home a large cash pize…but you will be the envy of all your friends.You will be the envy of all your friends.

They are looking for lots of different people with different stories and a big “fat”reason that they aren’t already their perfect self.

Send a name, age, address, contact number, height , weight and tell them about you fitness level, why you want to do this now, have you had injuries, and have you been at peak condition before and what happened. Tell them where you are emotionally and physically and send them a clear face shot and a full body shot. Send to NBCStrongCasting@gmail.com. Good luck!!! Please share with your friends.

GRACE AND FRANKIE IS DEFINATELY BINGE-WORTHY

old grace and frankie

Netflix…you have once again set the bar for great tv binge watching. Grace and Frankie are two 70-year-old women who find out at a dinner that their husbands, who are law partners, are gay. And to top that off they plan to marry and for the last twenty years have had an affair. Wow. That’s one hell of a premise.

Underneath the shock of an abrupt life change and realization that everything you though you had was a fraud…these women seem familiar. Grace is the together svelte country-club wife who built her own company and gave it to her daughter when she decided to build her relationship back with her distant husband. Grace is the hippie-chick-pot smoking-earth Mama who teaches are to convicts and has a great relationship with her husband Sol, played masterfully by Sam Waterston. (loved him in Network).

There is hilarity, ageism moments, children issues and the impact of being alone. These women, who have never been friends, find solace in each other.  When Grace slips back into a relationship with one of her husbands best friends, Frankie reminds her that you shouldn’t pretend to like things just to please a man.

We see the new gay couple struggle through moments of their own, but who care, right? It’s the girls that get our empathy and attention. Fonda and Tomlin are delicious in this movie. In real life Tomlin is 80 and Fonda is 75. No old chicks have ever been handed roles like this. They are fantastic. If you are offended by the f-bomb, look past it. Because you’re gonna hear it a lot. I grew up in a cigarette filled news room, and it is often a go-to word I often regret.

Dive in ladies.You are gonna love it!!!! Marta Kauffman is one of the creators of Friends. This is just friends grown up ditched and deserted and yes….having the time of their lives…with all the baggage that comes with it.

 

 

DISNEY LOOKING FOR FAMILIES FOR COMMERCIAL!!!!!

disney cruise

 Is your family kind of mousey?  You now the type that would like to go on a free Disney cruise, be in a commercial and every family member get a nice check?  The Disney empire is looking nationwide for Caucasian and Hispanic families to enjoy an all expenses paid cruise  and be in the commercial. Done and done.

Now I have to mention that the cruise is to Alaska and not the Caribbean. But seriously the cruise to Alaska even with boring old people is wonderful. And who doesn’t like to get out of the summer heat? Not to mention that you will be expected to kayak,hike, helicopter and sea plane excursion. It will go from Vancouver to Alaska. Vancouver, by the way , is a really cool place.

Families that are chosen will go to LA to Vancouver June 21 and return June 29th..

Each family member will be paid $2,500 plus some agency fees and a per diem. They are looking for  Hispanic families from 6-65.  (2 parents, 2 Grandparents and at least 3 kids….which can include siblings or cousins) Mom and dad in mid  to late 30’s…kids 6-10 and energetic grandparents.

Caucasian families can be from 10-45. Family of four. Don’t ask me why the specs are different. I don’t come up with these, I just tell you about them. They don’t want any body art…what they want are fun, easy-going families.  That are, of course, attractive.

Get the following info in by May 5th to . castingfamiliesforohaver@gmail.com

Name, city and state, address, describe family members. Tell them if you are submitting for the Hispanic or Caucasian family. Names, ages and descriptions of each family member. Send a group pic if possible. If not send individual pics. But I suggest getting a group pic (all in jpeg) let them see how cute your family is.

 

Good luck and please pass on!!!!!
.

.)

THE (OLD) GIRLS ARE BACK IN TOWN !!!

old lady chic

What is it about flamboyant older women that fascinates all of us. Could it be the ruby lipstick painted way outside the lip line. Or is the fascinating wardrobe mash ups they come up with. Or is it the sheer terror that a decade or two from now…that will be me!!! A garish combination of the Joker and Joan Collins.

Apparently the word of fashion isn’t having that moment. Probably because the world of fashion is dictated by thirty year olds. They can step back and look at these shall-we-say mature women and see the beauty in the chaos. In the movie world alone a documentary movie called  Iris is opening at the end of the month, a brilliant look at Iris Apfel and her penchant for flea market style. Last year a called Advanced Style, crafted by 33 year old Ari Seth Cohen, was a take on his blog of the same name. Again with th 30 year-olds.

 

The old broads are everywhere take a look:

Helen Mirran … in Woman in Gold, is 69

Jessica Lange,  forMarc Jacobs is 66

Joan Didion (writer) is the muse for Celine’

Joni Mitchell is the showpony for Yves Saint Laurent.

 

So before you get your Granny-on….here are a few more still to inspire you

oldlady style 2old lady3old lady 4

CASTING FRIDAY….LOOKING FOR SISTERS!!!!!

sisters

Do you have daughters or in their twenties  who like to take a walk on the wild side? The same producers that give you Keeping up with the Kardashians and Project Runway (Bunim-Murray) are looking for attention-getting sisters in their early twenties  that steal the limelight . You can only imagine the attention these sisters (or triplets) will be getting. Not for everyone by any means.

 Send your contact information (address, phones etc) , ages , photos (jpeg) or video, a description of why you and your sister are unique and would be great for the show. Be sure and put Sisters in the subject line of your email.  Keep in mind if they don’t get pictures you won’t even be considered. After all, these are the people who produce Kim Kardashian and crew. Send to
castingnow@bunim-murray.com

WORTH THE TICKET? THE LONGEST RIDE

Not quite used to a Bovine being used as a chick magnet….but that Nicholas Sparks knows a thing or two about romance. Take a determined son of a bull rider (who also happens to be the very dashing son of Clint Eastwood) and add a smart sorority girl determined to got to New York for an art internship and what do you have? Not much really. But that’s where the genius of Nicholas sparks steps in. Remember he had you at Notebook.

He recent movies have been a little less memorable, so Nicholas went back into his “I want to make them love me” bag of tricks and pulled out Alan Alda who the young couple save out of a car crash and the oh-yes-of-course box of letters to his wife. So we go back and forth in time telling two love stories for the price of one

The movie is romantic. Nicholas knows how to make men do and say the things we gals like to hear. It is different place that he takes us to in the world of bull riding.  A world we might not have know. And that, after all, isn’t that what movies are all about. I’d say it’s good, but no Notebook.  But if romance is what you’re after , and old fashioned romance at that, then this movie is for you. Not everyone thinks l-o-v-e comes with leather whips and a torture chamber.

It’s sweet , and satisfying, and perfectly chaste.

 

Do you agree? Let me know what you thought. Was it worth the ticket?

CASTING CALL–LOOKING FOR WEDDING PLANNERS!!!

 

bride

Do you know anyone who plans weddings? (One of those tough cookies that can tame bridezillas and plan the perfect venue?) A national television show is looking for those wedding planners and their staff and is wanting to make them a major brand.

They are looking for companies that can pull of the most incredible events from engagements to the actual wedding. They want people who are “big” characters that are really stoked by their jobs and what they can achieve.

They want the company to have a great track record and the ability to pull off miracles and give every wedding that AHHH moment.

Send  your name and address and other contact information  along with reasons you and your staff would be perfect for the show. Send recent photos of you and your staff and some of the weddings you’ve organized.

Send information to Castingforrings@gmail.com

Be sure and share this !!!!